R.I.P.

Here lie the remains of Homer L. Mensch, Ph.D.,
Who died in a session of Freshman English 103,
Taken off by a fit of hyperadrenal apoplexy,
When he learned only two out of thirty students had read
their assigned short story.
Before he expired he was heard to murmur softly,
"O Lord, what fools these freshmen be!"

The English Department staff
Has chosen the following epitaph
To appear on Mensch's stone at the mortuary:

"Cast ye not pearls before sleepy swine, lest they snore
in thy face!"